Family thinks I am trash. I just think I am a guy who likes to rack up cheevos and jack off on my bedsheets that a havent washed for 10 months, since I usually fall asleep completely wasted at the computer anyway so it doesnt really gross me out . there are times where I actually shower and say, I am going to get a good nights rest, and then I feel that lukewarm puddle from the morning sesh on my leg, and while I do feel a brief sense of shame, it quickly goes away as I pass into sleep with the sounds and visions of killstreaks from a days wirth of murking flashing against my eyelids and echoing in my soon to be void of a mind. Sometimes I actually make an effort to use a rag, but thats just more laundry, which by the way I cant do without extreme mental preparation and focus. I can bring the hamper upstairs from the basement , but when I get to the light and dark separation part I hear the Halo match countdown timer ticking down so I just run back downstairs and start cleaning house with my DMR. They say rock bottom is low, and I think I am there — but under those rocks is disgusting black muck and grime, and if the collection of dirt and shit, literal shit under my fingernails from not washing my hands is an indication, I might just sink even lower if thats possible and given my body mass, that wont take long. Last year I actually measured some detergent into a cup and washed the pathetically miniscule wardrobe I have, and even threw them in the dryer and ALMOST folded them before throwing them in a pile of dirty clothes in the corner that I forgot about. Sessions with my life coach have proved to be futile, but she admits that she actually respects my lack of ambition and that I enjoy doing jackshit, because she has saved all of her patients from desolation and I seem to be the only one who still just wants to smoke pot and play Xbox, despite countless NLP sessions. Well lol thats enough self pity, gotta head upstairs for dinner. If it is something undesirable I will probably just ride my bike to McDonalds and then purchase a 1 year sub to Xbox Live Gold, which is close to expiring.