2 articles Tag capnpayne

I Shit My Pants

One oclock. Its time after my class, the sun is shining, and I am about to take a crap in my pants.

Ding a ling dong! The bell strikes the time. I have eaten some mother shitting ass blaster burritos this morning — who cares, im a bachelor (bachelor life lol) — and I SCREAM out of my class with the force of a thousand epic raptors. This is going to be a real bit of cuntery.

I pound into the bathroom, but its too late. The creamy goodness, foulness, sprays out of my butt pipe all into my wranglers. Thats it. I shit in my pants. I shit inside of the pants I was wearing. Theres shit all over my legs and my bottom. I shit. I shit all inside of my pants and on my body. Theres shit all on my body, and its not in the toilet. I shit on myself.

Any other goons with similar experiecnes? It was fucking insane.


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a dark, black, big dark echo house

It was the morning time. And yet, I was barely awake. For it was just the day.My momma, she was a nice lady. Looking upon me and telling me I was cool. But i did not believe it. for I knew in my heart that I was a special boy, with a special power, but I dare not tell anyone. For who would believe?We were divorcing. Driving to the new house… a dark, somber house. It was a sad place. My new fake dad Jerry was in the car, telling me he loved me and thought he was smart and that he knew anything. Well you actually don’t, Jerry, and you are stupid and a fucking idiot. So we were yelling. But the scare of the night was upon us so we acted quite fine and nice and he seemed to realize finally that I was the better man. Or so we thought.

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Categories: Fiction  /  Tags: